Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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