I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
