We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize