why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
