Dude my mom stole all your condoms
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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