there was a trapeze. enough said
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
