Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
At least life still wants to fuck me.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize
