Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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