doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
