IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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