So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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