I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Randomize
