Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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