I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
i believe in u and ur pee
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
