For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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