worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
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