when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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