Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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