Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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