I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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