So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Say something about gay babies.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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