You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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