Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
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