Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
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I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize