god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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