some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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