You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
