Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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