You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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