I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize