hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize