Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.