Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
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