im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm always down for nudity.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
