Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
