I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
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