I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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