My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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