so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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