you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
His nipple licking is glorious
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