my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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