i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
