I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
