escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
