Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize