i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
