I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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