it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
