What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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