I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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