I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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