i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize