My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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